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    Angel Haven (story)


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    Angel Haven (story)

    Post by Mezkiel on Mon Mar 21, 2011 8:30 am


    It was the 3rd of March and frost still lingered on the knee high grass and Jack now wished he had brought his coat, it was the third day of march and Jack Elman was sitting in the Eternal meadows waiting for his friends to arrive to celebrate his last day as a trainee, it had taken seven attempts but Jack had finally reached the rank of angel.
    He stared out over the hills and admired the shear beauty of the Sanctisan Mountain.

    “Hey! Jack! We’re here!” Jack turned his head eagerly and saw his three best friends Tensu, Rio and Valkyrie
    “We have a celebration to deal with I’ve brought the ambrosia! what have you guys brought him?” Valkyrie said
    Tensu stepped and held out a sheathed blade with an inscription

    Everyone gasped, except Valkyrie who was thoroughly unimpressed by Tensu’s showy gift giving, as Tensu unsheathed the black sister blade and in his hands he held the fabled Scinami a blade passed down in the Meto family
    “Te-Tensu…… wow….really?” Jack asked he almost forgot how to speak at the sight of the blade. “Yes, let its faultless edge guide you in battle” Jack took the blade and stared in awe
    “Wow! My gift seems kinda crappy now” Valkyrie muttered. Rio and Tensu laughed, but jack was too busy admiring the beautiful blade
    “OH OH OH!” Rio said jumping up and down with his hand in the air.
    “yes, Rio?”
    “my turn now?” Rio queried, clearly desperate to give jack his gift.
    “yes.” jack answered.
    “YIPPEEE” Rio said and started rummaging threw his bag
    “he’s so immature” Valkyrie murmured
    “oh and you aren’t?” Tensu said with an exasperated sigh
    “GOT IT!” Rio yelled, rio pulled out a large scroll, took me a month, to find this! It was hidden in the strangest place…anyway it’s the enchanted scroll of the Scinami…I kinda spied on Tensu to find out what he got you and I figured you’d like the book on how to use it” Tensu stared at Rio
    “You...spied on me? How dare you!” Tensu dived after jack but he was too slow as Rio dashed out the way tensu jumped to his feet and chased him
    “Uhm guys…” Valkyrie whisperd but everyone was too busy laughing and enjoying them self suddenly the ground went hard and the moisture in the air reduced by 64%. Everyone went still. “Crap. Ice demons! How did they get in? Ah never mind we don’t have time for that.” Valkyrie whispered in a quiet and frantic voice Tensu looked around. “where are they-” the frost around them began to shimmer, and started forming the horrid disfigured shape of an ice demon.

    The four of them took at their weapons, Rio took out two Enchanted daggers, Valkyrie summoned her Burak Spear, tensu unsheathed a Akitashi and jack unsheathed the Scinami “Attack formation 6!” Jack Ordered and they all surrounded the beast from all angles. Rio threw an enchanted dagger at the demon momentarily stunning it. Tensu placed an holding technique on the demon locking it in its current position Jack and Valkyrie both ran at the ice demon and simultaneously pierced its chest with there weapons at which point the demon disintegrated leaving nothing but a pile of dust. “this cannot be good” jack muttered.

    The Council House

    The four of them were standing in front of the 12 celestial angels and all the other angels , as it was custom for fellow angels to watch reports and they were half way threw there report when they were interrupted
    “So your telling me some average if not quite weak demon just waltz right in to the eternal meadows and attacked you?” the 4th celestial angel asked not even trying to hide the scepticism in her voice
    “well…no. we don’t know how it got in there and I highly doubt it tangoed in-” Jack said
    “waltz” Tensu interrupted “she said waltz”
    “OK waltz but what I was saying is that it was hidden in the frost which means it morphed and all practisers of morphing were killed over 5000-”
    “I AM WELL AWARE OF WHEN MORPHERS WERE KILLED CHILD! Get on with your excuse” the 4th commanded
    “WELL WHY DON’T YOU SHUT UP AND LISTEN?” The hall went silent. No one ever talked to a celestial angel with such disrespect
    And everyone waited in silence to see how she would react.The 4th laughed off the rude outburst and replied “very well, you may continue.” Jack quickly continued

    “well as I was saying they were killed over 5000 years ago but there has always been the knowledge that the 3rd society continued to practice it and this was of no worry due to there strict laws but now that a demon performed morphing and demons bare no morals there is no telling what could happen.”

    Tensu then stepped forward to continue.
    “And that is why we are proposing to go on a mission to track down the 3rd society and place the traitor celestial under arrest and return him” Before any of the celestial angels could reply and grand master angel appeared before them
    “What would this gain” The 2nd asked
    “Well, demons have a very low intelligence so they couldn’t teach other so there’s no worry of that but by removing the celestial teacher that would essentially solve the problem.”
    “Fair enough, But what about Soul demons they are extremely intelligent and could possibly teach others.”
    “That is unlikely” Tensu answered “Soul demons hate the 3rd society and would never team up with them no matter what advantage it brought.
    “You may leave after Jack Elman’s Angel advancement tomorrow but going on such a dangerous mission requires atleast five angels I suggest Tami Neko an excellent scout, any objections?”
    “Good. Reporting adjourned” The four of politely bowed to every celestial angel individual then left the hall via two giant doors the moment they were outside Tensu and Rio high-fived “Score” they both shouted and Valkyrie just glared at them “Oh grow up you to”
    They just laughed and waltz to the Battle training centre.
    “YOU TWO ARE SO IMMATURE” Valkyrie yelled and she turned to Jack Elman but he had already disappeared into the dormitories
    “boys…” Valkyrie muttered and went about her business.

    The 4th of March

    Jack Elman awoke to the sound of waves crawling up the beach and seagull’s squawking he thought to himself and just lay there in the relaxing beaches of Alkemai Lake. It took him a while to realise that should be in the dormitories, he looked towards the sun and calculated its position “crap. 11 o‘clock” he tried to get up and then remembered why they were the warm beaches Alkemai lake. They contained the angry searing souls of trapped angels he attempted to run, crawl, jump but realised the beaches render the person’s legs useless he unfolded his wings but to his horror they were numb and refusing to cooperate. “Crap.crap.crap.crap.”
    “Language child.” a voice close behind him said
    “Look old man, I don’t have time for your opinion on profanity I have a angel advancement in an hour” Jack said impatiently
    “you still have another test”
    “what are you talking about” jack was confused and annoyed “no one told me there was a final test.
    “What? Did you think there was no final test? Hmp. So naïve, you my child have quite a feat ahead of you.” Jack went silent and the only sound audible was the waves picking up pace and hitting a small lagoon. “Hurry up child, if you don’t move quickly the Silver waves will certainly drown you. Slowly”
    “there just small waves”
    “I will not repeat my self child.” Then what seemed like pity shimmered across the old mans eyes but before jack could comment the old man to faded out into dust.

    The 3rd Society

    A lone hooded figure approached the hidden entrance to the 3rd Society and was instantly surrounded by The Imperial Sentinel
    “Excellent. You haven’t slipped at all since I left.” said the figure, a
    smirk slightly showing underneath the rim of his hood
    “Master Echo!” one sentinel assumed correctly
    “I have returned from my pilgrimage to the Shadow country and I have brought with me an apprentice, lets see how well the imperial sentinel fend against her.” A hooded child, 15 pounced from the shadows, unsheathed two daggers and quickly and ran towards the crowd of shocked guards, she quickly took out four of sentinel ; she crouched low and charged at the Head sentinel, he summoned his DemonStaff in a futile attempt to attack but the child was too fast for him. he didn’t even get a chance to fire before the a dagger flew straight into his eye he screamed out in pain as the poison tipped dagger took affect. Another Sentinel confronted the child and blasted crude lighting at the her but The Apprentice was too quick for him she dodged the energy allowing it to hit a pursuing sentinel who immediately fell to the floor motionless and she drained the attacking Sentinel of his life energy.
    The apprentice then unsheathed a blood red shadow blade. It was no longer a contest of skill and strength all the reaming sentinels knew they were doomed but bound by the honour code they still attacked. They all were wiped out instantly. “Hahahaha. Your going to do well my apprentice.” Master echo laughed cruelly.
    “yes master.” the girl said bowing to him barely managing to hide her proud smile.

    Main Characters:
    Jack Elman(trainee): A 15yr looking (real age unknown) Angel. He is intelligent, sarcastic and a fierce fighter in battle.
    He may be slow to anger but when he does get angry get the hell out of his way!

    Tensu Meto(angel): He is one of Jack Elman’s best friends. He looks roughly 17 but it has been established that his real age is 5300yrs old. Tensu is notorious for his skills with a bow and arrow and he is also excellent with his angelic blade named “Akitashi”

    Rio Makio(trainee): Rio has a cheerful and friendly persona but this changes instantly at the sight of blood he becomes a untameable beast set out to kill the enemy, armed with nothing but his bare hands.

    Valkyrie Banshi(angel): Jack’s ex-enemy, they are now best friends and a devastatingly powerful duo in battle. Valkyrie is epically skilled in the field of healing, magic and enchanting objects.

    Denvux Nove(angel): Along time ago Denvux would bully jack constantly but when jack became friends with Rio, Rio insisted he stood up to him. And he did. Jack embarrassed Denvux in front of all his friends and Denvux has been after revenge since.

    Tami Neko(scout):
    Makura (unknown, possible celestial lord): Lieutenant of the celestial court, celestial army and the angelic council. Very little is known about him except he manages almost all of the official angelic events. He respected by everyone throughout Angel Haven.

    Grand Master Angel(Angel): Leader and owner of angel haven. He established at the beginning of time he and all the eternal angels have been fighting Demons to protect the human race.

    The Echo Master: Leader of the 3rd society, a mostly mutual demon and the only public morpher.
    The City:

    What is it?:
    Angel Haven is the only place in existence where angels can rest, train, forge items, bless and enchant objects without attacks from demons. No one quite knows how it came to existence but most angels are to busy training to care.

    What is in it?:
    In Angel Haven there are many facilities such as:
    Healing/healing training centre
    Battle/tactics training centre
    Temple of the eternals
    Lake of valour(healing)
    Magic training centre
    Angel Magic teaching

    Where is it?:
    Its position in space is unknown but there are portals(trans-dimensional transportation A.K.A teleport) leading to it in every city of every country on the earth. Only accessible for angels


    Before time these beasts had very little to do and they wondered around aimlessly, but when time was created and the demons saw so many living creatures they decided instantly together to wipe everything out and go back to a time of peace and they almost succeed they launched ball of fire at every planet and wiped out life but the Angels breathed life onto the planets and started life again.

    Unfortunately the demons didn’t give up and have been continuously trying to wipe out life since using these like the living creations into war with each other in the hope that they would wipe them selves out and so demon increased the intelligence of mortals everywhere in the hope with there new intelligence they would find a better way of killing each other luckily things didn’t go as planned because angels disguised them selves as a thing called a ‘pacifist’, ‘paci’ in ancient angelic script meaning ‘peace bringer’ and have been ending wars ever since.


    Newborn: Recently born into existence, and is currently learning the ways of the angels
    Trainee: Training to become an angel
    Angel: An angelic warrior
    Scout(Equal to angel): An angel that specializes in tracking, long distance fighting and stealth flight.
    Celestial angel: An angelic warrior of extreme skill and strength.
    Grand Master Angel: there is only one of these and it is unlikely there will be another(he is immortal) but there can be another if he anoints someone else as the Grand Master Angel.

    Last edited by Mezkiel on Mon Mar 21, 2011 10:43 am; edited 2 times in total
    Ranger 50

    Posts : 1235
    Age : 22

    Re: Angel Haven (story)

    Post by Ranger 50 on Mon Mar 21, 2011 8:46 am

    Epic! You know, the rate you're going atm, I might post up a few stories myself <.<
    Sold Out

    Posts : 1679
    Age : 24

    Re: Angel Haven (story)

    Post by Sold Out on Mon Mar 21, 2011 8:48 am

    Well, that was unexpected.

    Also, while your scenarios are pretty cool, but it's like trying to start to read a book from the middle. Now, I have seen introductions like this, and they work, but maybe try adding one or two explanations or motifs here. ^^

    Also, commas. Commas. Commas. And punctuation. You maybe should cross-check your texts in order to make it a better read. Sometimes a sentence structure just struck me and I had to read it twice because of that.

    Except for that, good job; keep up the good work.

    Also, Ranger, we are going to do that soon enough anyway. Not just Mez and you.

    Currently listening to...

    Posts : 387
    Age : 21
    Location : Meanwhile in england...

    Re: Angel Haven (story)

    Post by Mezkiel on Mon Mar 21, 2011 8:50 am

    ranger *cough* mind fixing my commas commas commas? *blink blink*

    @sold ill add abit of the character/story plan i made


    Re: Angel Haven (story)

    Post by Guest on Mon Mar 21, 2011 8:55 am

    Eheh mezkeil. Another nice one! Good luck to all of us with this new "section" of stories.

    Squad : Apocalyptic Noodles
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    Age : 21
    Location : In a pineapple under the Sea

    Re: Angel Haven (story)

    Post by Xin on Mon Mar 21, 2011 8:58 am

    Dude once again this is pure genius! Keep it up ^^

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    Re: Angel Haven (story)

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